How do you control teenagers?

she is driving me carzyHow do you control teenagers?
An open dialouge is extremely necessary. She has to trust you, but you can't forget that she is experiencing for the first time the same hormonal changes that you have had years to adjust to. Mood swings, body changes, skin changes and the like are all contributing to her new personality. Be patient, and talk to her often.





We can't expect our teens to just ';get it';. Their personalities are growing and developing. They are questioning everything, and their bodies are in a constant state of flux. SHe will grow out of it.





I remember when my neice became a teenager. My sister was going crazy like you. It wasn't until she was almost an adult when it hit her that it's a very cruel joke to give a girl the body of a woman and all the desires that come with it and emotions of a child. My neice was confused. Should she play with dolls or date? The line between childhood and adolescence is sooo thin. The biological process takes place over six months or so, but the social, physical and emotional processes take years to complete.





Most people believe that it's jsut rebelion (a guaranteed growing pain), but I personally believe that it's a cruel joke on a child that their bodies give them desires and a certain level of independence because they are fully able to do everything an adult can do without the maturity to do it. It takes immense understanding on the part of a parent to give them growing degrees of responsibility and independence. This helped my neice. She and my sister sat down together and drew up a contract around the age of 14. It outlined dating, chores, social activities, grades. They agreed on the rules together. Of course there were some that were not negotiable, but she had a part in the decisions that would mold her future. The battles between them were then few and far between.





I remember once after the contract was signed that my neice at 16 got a ';B-'; in one of her classes (She had never made a ';B'; in her life and had an IQ of 154). Because of the contract, her social activities were reduced to the weekends only until she brought hom 3 ';A's'; from tests in teh class. There was a battle, but she brought her grades up and got over it. In essence, she had a job to do. Her job was to be responsible. If you don't get the work done, you have work overtime.





If you like, please email me regarding the contract. It was quite brilliant. I plan to use the idea myself.





I keep editting, but I just thought of something else after reading other responses. People seem to think that they need to add more and more rules as their children get older. It's understandable with dating and all the other things on their minds, but you have to add more and more freedoms and not assume they know what the rules are until they break them. There should be the absolutes about drinking, drugs and the like, but how they cut their hair and what they wear (as long as it covers from Cleveland to Virginia and isn't the wrong size) is not so important. It might embarass you to have a daughter with a crew cut, but if she is mature about schoolwork and such, does it really matter? At this point, she will develop her own sense of morality because of what you have taught her, but I'll add that if you haven't talked to her about sex, drugs, and appropriate behaviors, she will have a difficult time if she's yelled out understanding your point.How do you control teenagers?
I have a 15 yr old son. He doesn't drink, have sex or use drugs. But he thinks he knows everything and he's angry a lot of the time. And I have no idea what to do except wait it out. I wish I could give you advice. I outgrew the teenage attitude. Probably your daughter will also.
obviously. you have had atleast 2 easy spelling errors.





i am sorry but we are uncontrolable. again i am really sorry.
Do what I did with my kids, chain them up in the basement, and feed them a bucket of fish heads once a week, (it works wonders) (lol)
Well,as you probaly already know all teenagers go through this stage.but you have to put your foot down and show them who the parent is.Start grounding her or taking things away.Although it probaly wont work at first but eventually she will get tired of you taking things away and she will hoprfully straighten her self out.But sometimes with teens you have to show them tough love.I have had the same problem but it's kinda calming down.Just be sure that you stick to what you say.
put them in a stray jacket so she carnt lash out lmao not really listen to what she has to say and dont shout over her!! she might not give you respect but you give her respect dont shut her out! shes going to be wild for a while just treat her when shes good punish her when shes bad and DONTT tell her to go to her bed room its got everything she likes in there put her in the room with the least intresting things in the room!! treat her like a new puppy give her love be there when she needs you and wipe up the mess shes left and when shes angry carm her down and talk to her like and adult!!!
YOU LEAVE THEM ALONE!!!
give her boundaries, rules (curfew, not cussing, conversing with every other person respectfully, doing good in school, etc.) it's important to punish her right away (punish like grounding her or taking away her phone and other privileges) for not obeying you so that she gets to understand her wrong doing immediately. but you must tell her everytime that it's for her so that she'll become a better person, to be able to set her own values and make her own wise decisions, and also because you love her.
This is the common mistake of parents. You don't just ask how to control them when they already have a mind of their own. You start while they're still young. You give them proper love and affection. You teach them values that hopefully they will carry as they grow into puberty. When they're in this stage, you don't control them. The more you control, the more they want to break free. If there is already a gap between the two of you, you start bridging those gaps by extending your patience and understanding. remember, this is a difficult time for them, figuring out different things for themselves. Don't make things more difficult. What they need now is a friend who can understand, then be a parent and guide. ';Guide and advice'; don't dictate.
u really can't ur gonna have to find a way 2 compromise with her b4 she gets 2 out of hand
Control is the wrong word. You need to say to them that you are a group of adults sharing your lives, how can you all work together so things are fair for you all. Treat them that way, and they'll act the way you want. Most of the time anyway....
You CANNOT control a teenager. You have to make them want to control themselves.


How do you do this?


By not giving them everything they want. They should earn privelages for proper behavior.
Your Teen has/wants something of great value. When I was unruly my mother threatened to take away my guitar, or my freedom. I would actually get punished, and she would make me go through the whole thing. She's no joke, and I knew it.
you can't


you need MUTUAL respect


and then everything should fall into place
With lotsa love and a spanking